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🦋 That/ soon is such a vague word.
Ellen sent me a link to this beautiful poem, written by her old teacher Raymond Federman at the very end of his life, in the spring time:
A Matter of Enthusiasm
I am rereading Malone Dies just to mock death a little and boost my cancerous spirit.
I shall soon be quite dead at last Malone tells us at the beginning of his story.
What a superb opening what a fabulous sentence.
With such a sentence Malone announces his death and at the same time delays it.
In fact all of Malone's story is but an adjournment.
Malone even manages to defer his death until the end of eternity.
That soon is such a vague word.
How much time is soon? How does one measure soon?
Normal people say I'll be dead in ten years or I'll be dead before I'm eighty or I'll be dead by the end of this week Quite dead at last Malone specifies.
Unlike Malone prone in bed scribbling the story of his death with his little pencil stub normal standing people like to be precise concerning their death.
Oh how they would love to know in advance the exact date and time of their death.
How relieved they would be to know exactly when they would depart from the great cunt of existence in Malone's own words to plunge into the great lie of the afterlife.
How happy they would be if when they emerge into life the good doctor or the one responsible for having expelled them into existence would tell them you will die at 15:30 on December 22, 1989.
Could Sam have written I shall soon be quite dead at last had he known in advance when he would change tense?
Certainly not because as Malone tells us a bit further in his story
I shall die tepid without enthusiasm.
Does that mean on the contrary of those idiots on this bitch of an earth who explode themselves with fervor to reach the illusion of paradise while taking with them other mortals that Malone's lack of enthusiasm towards his own death is a clever way of delaying the act of dying?
A lack of enthusiasm for something is always a way of postponing the terms of that something.
The soon of Malone mocks the permanence of death and his lack of enthusiasm ridicules the expression at last.
And so before he reaches the end of the first page of his story Malone has already succeeded in postponing his death to Saint John the Baptist's Day and even the Fourteenth of July. Malone even believes he might be able to resist until the Transfiguration not to speak of the Assumption which certainly throws some doubt as to what really happened on that mythical day or what will happen to Malone if he manages to hang on until then.
In fact Malone defies his own death by giving himself birth into death as he explains at the end of his story.
All is ready. Except me. I am being given, if I may venture the expression, birth to into death, such is my impression. The feet are clear already, of the great cunt of existence. Favorable presentation I trust. My head will be the last to die. Haul in your hands. I can't. The render rents, My story ended I'll be living yet. Promising lag. That is the end of me. I shall say I no more.
Nothing more to add this evening. Malone said it all for me. I can go to sleep calmly now. Good night everybody.
I thank Robert Archambeau of Samizdat blog for sharing this poem, and Ellen for sending it to me.
posted evening of Wednesday, November 18th, 2009 ➳ More posts about Ellen ➳ More posts about Samuel Beckett ➳ More posts about Readings ➳ More posts about Poetry
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