🦋 Jeremy doesn't understand shopping for clothes
This afternoon, whilst zipping up, I discovered that the wear at the crotch of my trousers had grown from a purely private source of shame to a potentially public embarrassment -- yes I wear my pants until they wear out and frequently beyond, because I don't like shopping for clothes. (The crotch always seems to be the first place to go, I think because of excess fat on my inner thighs -- not working out is another source of shame.) So I said to myself, this afternoon you got to go buy another pair of pants. I know there is a men's clothing store of some kind on 42nd Street, across from my office; I will just slip in there on my way to the train. Hmm... "Strawberry" -- that looks to be a clothing store of some kind. [Peering in window, seeing lacy undergarments] no, wrong gender... Ah! "Kenneth Cole" should have something suitable for the office. [Peering in window, seeing lacy undergarments] What!? [Coming along to the next window where there are shirts and ties] Ah, that's better. [Ducking in the door and looking at the price tag on the first pair of pants I see] Wait, $54?! Clothing can't cost that much! I think there's a "Gap" on the next block, [Ducking back out of KC and sauntering along, sees a "Banana Republic" sign] OK, that must be what I was thinking of... So I went along into the Banana Republic, picked up the first pair of pants I saw, was dazed and dismayed by its price tag of $118 [no lie!]; the second pair of pants, "only" $39, seemed like a great deal by comparison. After a bit of hunting I found the fitting rooms and it took me only a couple of iterations of confusion to figure out that the doors were all closed not because they were all in use and the guy standing by the doors wearing a nametag was not a hapless shopper like myself, waiting for the next free one; he was the guy with the key! and would let me in if I only asked him to!! I came away with a pair of pants -- $40 still sticks in my craw as a lot of money for clothing -- and filled out an application for a Banana Republic charge card, which I was assured would "earn" me beaucoup "rewards". I didn't stick around to find out what the rewards would be, or how I would earn them.
posted evening of Tuesday, June 24th, 2003
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